stream of letting go

We are flipping our daughter's room today to a "big girl's room," and it feels like I'm turning the page of a plastic, storyless baby's book to the next page of a bright, exciting pop-up book. What was stationary and pudgy, like chunky baby legs are now grown up, skipping, running little girl's legs. Pastels are cranked up into bold hues. What was blurry with deep blue, infant eyes is now clear with her sparking green ones. She has choices now--one of the most important being, does she use her powers for good, or for evil? I'm hoping her surroundings help stimulate the goodness I know is there. Reading in bed (learning), hosting tea for her little stuffed friends (serving), and letting her thoughts run over the day's event before drifting off to peaceful sleep (praying and meditating). A room to yourself is such a luxury. Quietness is such a indulgence. Independence in a 12' x 13' room is a whole new responsibility. These are some of the things I'm actively giving my daughter today. I offer her small, bite-size pieces of the world as my mothering duty, but letting her have them is a whole other issue.

God, how it must have ached your heart to let us grow up-- to give us choice.